A Self-Devaluation Conflict is a shocking moment that catches you off guard when your psyche perceives…
“I can’t do it”
“I’m not capable”
“I’m no good”
“I’m not ____ enough”
“Something is wrong with me”
The experience of incapability is biologically linked to the tissues in your body that perform functions that make you able to do a task, your connective tissues- muscles, bones, ligaments, blood vessels, lymph, fat, etc.
Depending on the situation and what you are perceiving yourself as not capable of doing, the specific areas of the body involved will begin to adapt according to their biological function.
During the active conflict there is loss of tissue.
As you actively feel “not enough” your tissues become thinner, there is necrosis of tissue, weakening of the area, decalcification, osteoporosis, osteopenia, anemia, etc.
This necrosis persists as long as the conflict is active.
Ongoing active self-devaluation of a particular tissue predisposes this area to injury and a normal movement or activity that wouldn’t usually cause a problem could result in a fracture or rupture.
The intensity of the self-devaluation determines which layer of connective tissue will be affected:
Light Devaluation = Fat, Blood Vessels
Moderate Self-Devaluation = Lymph, Cartilage, Ligaments
Severe Self-Devaluation = Bones
When this conflict is active you will have compulsive thinking about the thing you are feeling incapable of doing, the thing you feel stupid about, the situation that is unjust, the thing you can’t get a handle on etc.
BUT THEN as soon as you resolve the conflict the body immediately begins building back better than before and the involved tissue becomes thicker, bigger, stronger, and more capable after the biological program is complete.
Thats the whole point of this biological adaptation = stronger after resolution!
Following conflict resolution the tissue begins at once to repair and rebuild. When this repair process is taking place the tissue is swollen, tender, warm, tense, stiff, sore, etc.
If the bones were involved in the conflict you will also have elevated white blood cell count during the healing phase of a severe self-devaluation conflict.
Remember: PAIN is an indication of HEALING
The duration and intensity of the active conflict determines the length and intensity of the healing phase. Once the repair work is completed the swelling and discomfort subsides and the tissue is stronger than before which fulfills the biological purpose of this adaptation.
Conflict Tracks and Chronic Pain
What if the pain is chronic and never seems to go away?
In the case of chronic pain, there are tracks that are reactivating the conflict every day.
A track is an environmental reminder that was programmed in when the conflict first occurred that serves as a warning sign that the conflicting situation is happening again and thus the adaptation immediately is reactivated.
For example, if you were in school when you were called to the blackboard to solve a math problem, you made a mistake, and the teacher made a comment about your intelligence — this could have been a conflicting moment that initiated a biological program of the skull or cervical spine.
“I’m not smart enough!” = Intellectual Self-Devaluation
“It’s not right I was treated that way!” = Injustice Self-Devaluation
At the moment of this conflict the brain could have registered the smell of chalk, the sound of the chalk against the blackboard, authority figures, standing in front of groups, etc. as a warning sign for this type of conflict.
Later in life you may find that you get a stiff neck every time you deal with authority figures or that you have a strong aversion to being in front of groups because you always feel like an idiot in those situations.
Just imagine if this person goes on to work in a corporate environment with a boss overseeing them each day… this would be a recipe for chronic neck pain!
Each day when you encounter an authority figure at work you’re on track and then you come home at the end of the day with a terrible pain in your neck.
Isn’t it interesting that we use the common expression “He’s a real pain in the neck”?
Differentiating an Injury From Biological Special Program
This biological program allows us to understand musculoskeletal pain that occurs in absence of an injury.
Injuries are mechanical and do not have a biological conflict shock origin, but rather an external physical origin.
Depending on the extent of the injury healing should only take a few weeks, 6-8 weeks for a broken bone.
However, if healing is taking a longer time to complete that means there is also an active self-devaluation program causing loss of tissue which is preventing the injury from complete healing.
A person who has been injured can experience a biological conflict shock regarding their incapacity which then extends the healing time.
For example, the man who says his elbow “has never been the same” since his big injury as a football star in high school.
When it comes to self-devaluation you have to examine where you are deriving your self value from.
A young man who is star of the football team likely derives his self-value from his coaches, teammates, and peers who give him positive feedback about his performance.
If he has an accident and injures his elbow that in itself is not a Conflict Shock (DHS) that can be seen on a brain scan.
However, if when the injury occurred or in the time afterwards when he is struck with the realization that he will not be able to perform on the team or that his future plans for college might be ruined, his source of self-value is in jeopardy this definitely can be a Conflict Shock.
The person needs to pay attention to their compulsive thinking and what they say to themself about their injury.
If they are saying “I’m worthless”, “I’m no good”, “How am I ever going to succeed now?”, etc. that is an indication that they may also have a self-devaluation conflict on top of the injury.
“Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy” and “Complex Regional Pain Syndrome” are the fancy medical labels for an injury that is causing pain that is out of proportion to the original injury.
They guess that it is due to a “malfunction” of the nervous system, when it is a biological adaptation to ongoing self-devaluation following an injury.
Remember the 5th Biological Law- the body does not make mistakes, it responds based on its ancient survival programming.
So What Do You Do?
Now the question becomes… what do you do about it?
Every biological conflict needs a solution or you need to avoid the tracks that reactivate your adaptation.
If the symptoms are still occurring it means that the biological conflict is still relevant in your life.
A conflict is resolved when it can’t happen again or when you can laugh about it.
The solution to your conflict is unique and subjective to you and your experience.
What was the original conflict that caught you off guard and made you question your self-worth, self-value, or capability?
Why was this such a big deal for you then?
Why is this still relevant to you now?
What would it take for you to laugh about it?
Often we need to make a practical change to our life, work, or environment to resolve a conflict.
We can also shift our inner attitude and our perception of the situation for the conflict to no longer be relevant to us.
If you’re interested in my suggestions for how to approach this kind of conflict you can check out the Resolve Library of Self-Devaluation Classes or join me and Steve live on 5/29 for the Resolve Workshop on Intellectual and Injustice Self-Devaluations.
Bring awareness to the concept of self-devaluation conflicts and begin to pay attention your reactions to symptoms and situations.
May you grow in self-awareness, biological understanding, and inner harmony each day.
With love,
Dr. Melissa
I've felt and intuited this very issue regarding my mother's arthritis...that she feels some level of ineptitude in caring for her family and therefore her hands, the very tools she uses to care for others, have actually become incapable to some degree.
Is there one particular conflict related to core weakness?